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Share your stories and tips about stress in the work place, job burnout, hostile work environment, and a bad boss!
1) Stress in the work place What’s your story? This is a place where you can share tips on how you deal with stresses and the negatives at work, or you can vent your frustrations and see if the tips from others could help. First, let me set the stage up for discussion. Stress is inevitable. Most of us want to eliminate stress from our life. You might expect us to write something that shows you how to get rid of stress, but here we want to present you with something more– To channel the emotions and power of stress into productive energy. There is good stress and bad stress. Good stress is necessary for our survival. Without it, we will be slow in reacting to challenges. When our body senses threats or urgency, it releases adrenaline and cortisol into our bloodstream. These hormones create a burst of energy that enable us to rise up to the moment. With that short-term boost, we can perform our task more efficiently, and memorize things better. Think about when you usually get things done– It’s when a deadline draws close. The hormones sharpen our senses and increase our energy level. Our blood vessels are widened, and our heartbeat speeds up to allow more blood into the muscles. Successful people achieve a lot because they are able to turn their stresses into positive energy. Instead of procrastinating or fidgeting, they maintain their stresses at the optimal level that energizes them instead of exhausting them. When the stress level is too intense, or lasts too long, it becomes bad stress. Bad stress is the cause of many diseases such as heart disease, high blood pressure, insonmia, and stomach aches. It causes mental fogginess, body pains, and job burnout. If you look back at the times when strange diseases sprouted up, or your health condition suddenly deteriorated, you might discover that it happened during a very stressful time. The cost of bad stress is too high, so let’s pinpoint the causes of bad stress, and effective ways that could channel it into positive energy. Causes of bad stress Share your question, story, or tips Transforming stress into productive energy: The above tips target internal causes for bad stress. For internal causes, you are the one who needs to change, but sometimes bad stress is created by external forces such as a hostile work environment, bad boss, unethical organizational values, or unsuitable job. If that is the case for you, you have to prepare for a fight or flight situation, because as we know bad stress is too costly. Just read on to find tips on how to deal with external sources of bad stress. Share your question, story, or tips Burnout is an exhaustion of the mind, emotion, and body. You may feel that your inner reserve of energy is being sucked dry. You might still have plenty of strength and interest for vacations and other things you enjoy, but whenever work comes across your mind you immediately feel the fatigue. Don’t be too quick to punish yourself with guilt and shame. There is more than one way to look at a problem. Often, problems are simply perceptions we accepted into our mind. Burnout is an indication that things are going wrong. Burnout itself isn’t wrong. Don’t try to push yourself to work longer hours or ignore the tiredness of work. Burnout doesn’t happen overnight. It is a consequence of repeated exposure to bad stress. Go back to Transforming stress into productive energy to look for useful tips. Check for symptoms of job burnout, rate the following statement from 1 to 5 and see how intense and frequent your symptoms are. 1 being rarely happens and not intense. 5 being frequently happens and very intense. Share your question, story, or tips 9 Techniques that make you resilient to job burnout Important: The following techniques are designed for you to use together simultaneously. If you only pick one or two, that’s great, but you won’t get the synergy effect. Slavery is earned. Nowadays we still have slaves in North America– They earn their slavery for the illusion of security and a regular paycheque. Not you of course. It is NOT wrong to work for someone. Be a good steward, but don’t bend ourselves so much that we break our backbones. If an organization’s philosophy violates our conscience and beliefs, or if the work environment is hostile, then we need to speak up. Sometime if the violation from the workplace is standing in the way of your work performance, either the workplace has to change or you have to resign. It is far more important to defend your integrity and dignity than to compromise so much that you feel sick about yourself. If someone is acting like a kid/tyrant and thinks he or she is above basic respect and manners, confront that person no matter what position that person is in. Internalizing anger and hurt isn’t forgiveness. The longer you internalize the wrongs, the more likely you are going to develop a psychological, or physical disorder or disease. Another possibility is that the hurt inside you will turn into bitterness and anger that could damage your soul. What you are is more important than what you do. Would you trade your soul for a paycheque? Remember, there is no job security anyway. People come and go. Corporations downsize and layoff regularly. Always be truthful. You can be discreet, but if the truth can help the business and everyone then speak it. What you say has to be well thought out and provide real values. People may not like it at first but, at the end, if your words pass the tests of fire you will earn your credit and respect. Be assertive and clear. Make your requests known and share your concerns with the boss. You never know if you never try. You never get if you never ask. If you have fears, people will take advantage of those fears and manipulate you. Don’t be afraid of getting fired. If you are not afraid of being fired, you’re a free person. People will see that confidence and come to respect you. What if some nasty individual randomly targets you? Sometime they want to look smart or get attention by using bad humor. They may not have an agenda against you at first. However, as it gets fun they may go on toying with you forever. In that case, a deliberate silence and strict stare in their eyes would do wonder. Next time if that nasty person does “it” again, stare him in the eyes and remain silent. Wait until he speaks. The first person who says something loses, so don’t say anything and wait for the next word that comes out of his mouth. Remain silent until he is embarrassed enough to turn away or turn red. One day a father tried this technique on his kid for fun. Father stared at his kid. Kid, “What?” Silence… Kid, “I didn’t take the cookie!” Silence… Kid, “You mean the cookies in the jar on the kitchen table?” Silence… Kid cried, “Mom!” You get the idea. Silence and staring (or no stare, simply silence is powerful enough) only work if you are a confident and secure individual. Use it only when you sense that you are being picked on for quite a while and that you feel that the floodgate of endless teases is being opened. Do it carefully and maturely. User discretion is advised. Silence is highly matchable with other supplemental techniques, such as silence-and-fake-smile, silence-and-then-talk-to-others, silence-and-turn-away, silence-and-look-at-the-other-way, silence-whenever-you-speak, silence-and-pretend-to-think…etc. If all else failed, confront that person one-on-one, and escalate the issue, depending on its severity. However, technique fades but characters last. Sometime there is no quick fix. It all comes down to personal growth. The silence-and-match technique is only useful when we reach a certain level of maturity. Here is a profile of someone who is likely to become a target: Share your question, story, or tips
Some people always win. Why? Because they pick the battles that they can win. Play by your strengths. Select a few major tasks each day and do them well. I understand that you may be afraid to cut out tasks that make you feel weak. However, often time the tasks that make you feel weak are tasks that can be eliminated or outsourced with little cost. If the weakening tasks are more important, there are still choices. You can choose to tailor your job to fit your strengths. Or you can hire experts and high quality assistants to help you out (your boss doesn’t need to know). No one can be everything to everybody. Don’t try to be an agreeable person to everyone. You will only accumulate enemies faster. Be clear on where you stand and be assertive. When it comes to dealing with troublemakers or people that stand in your way, confront them when you have sufficient evidence and arguments to support your case. Speak the truth (gently) when you know the pros outweigh the cons. Before you get into battle mode though, always ask yourself these questions: What is the absolute worst that could happen if I don’t fight? Would it damage my career? Would it affect my independence, work performance, or psychological health? If the answers are no, then be flexible and seek collaboration or even compromise. Share your question, story, or tips 3) Create an aura of positive influence that keeps you from battles at all If you have read or heard of Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, you know what I am talking about. Overcome evil with good. Return blessings for curses. What goes around comes around. Gossip, politics, destructive criticism, and anger towards others only invite a similar return, with compound interest. As you practice lessons from teachings such as “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, trouble will avoid you. Why? Because a bully tends to avoid bullying someone who has many friends. Why would they want to bully you anyway? You are reasonable, likeable, patient, easy going, empathetic, grateful… etc. You will also attract similar people like yourself. Being surrounded by great friends make your life easier and happier. You can’t have the right friends if you don’t have the right enemies. Avoid friendships with the lazy, the nasty boys, the whiners, and the like. They reduce your productivity. Friendships with the wrong people keep you from having friendships with the right people. Law of Attraction! Make sure gossip stops at you or avoids you. At first you might feel left out because you are not involved, but you will soon discover peace due to the absence of complaints and negatives. Share your question, story, or tips 4) Knowledge, tools, and skill bring you far Problems at work can seem unsolvable if we don’t borrow experiences and knowledge from others. Read a good book each month. Visit forums and blogs to get an idea of what might be useful. The best source of great ideas and proven strategies is the word of mouth. Academic knowledge is usually too deep, too expensive, too old, or too impractical, but knowledge that works is easier to acquire than people might think. Read readers’ reviews of books you are considering to get. Pick authors who have been there, done that, and got the Tee shirt. Read the sections that are relevant to your current problems. A proven strategy in one industry can be transferred into another industry to multiply its result by 10. Sounds unbelievable, doesn’t it? Take flush toilet as an example. It was invented in 1775, but it took another 100 years before people equipped it with toilet paper. Imagine if you were the one who put the two together. All you would have needed was to know a bit more and think outside of the box a little bit. People tend to focus only on their own industry and what happens around their cubicles. It isn’t that hard to beat the competition since most people won’t bother to invest in their career or business as the required effort increases. It might seem hard to learn new tools and become familiar with them, but the rewards are very high. Success and riches go to those who take the hard road. Most people quit learning in the early stages, so it doesn’t take really that long for you to get ahead. In exodus-from-9to5.com, you will constantly get tips and ideas on what might be useful. Share your question, story, or tips 5) Take the tractor and dump the shovel Another reason for people to feel stressed is because they live in the illusion of competition. They got so used to competition that at some point in their life they stopped questioning why they’re competing. Most competitions that take place at work are like mud-digging tournaments (I made that up)– there is no point. We try to have the longest work hours. We want to say something and cut in frequently during meetings so we can be heard. We like to have the most cluttered desk (to look busy and important). We compete for the most frequent usage of blackberry and gadgets. We like to complain and hint about how we are more stressed than the others. Can you imagine if there was actually a mud-digging tournament? That would be silly. The thing that matters most is the bottom line. You can finish your work in half the time of what others spend as long as you deliver the same result. Unfortunately, most people don’t realize that they are still using a shovel, and wonder why some people are so successful and quick. Life is unfair! The tractor isn’t hard to maneuver. It’s easier too! Outsource if the tasks are tedious and are be done by someone else online. Hire PhD students from India or China to do part of your work. Build a website to help you prospect clients 24/7 instead of cold calling. Have a virtual assistant to do the scheduling…etc. Hiring contractors, assistants, or business experts isn’t an exclusive right of the Fortune 500 companies. You can also hire students or retired professionals to help with your projects. It could be a great preparation to start your own business sometime in the future. Share your question, story, or tips 6) Double and Triple your productivity by doing less The key is to guard your precious time. Limit yourself to do only what is most important. Double or triple your most productive activities and minimize the rest. Don’t let yourself work any longer than necessary. Why? In a 9 to 5 job, there is too much time. People are socially conditioned to pad it up with activities. Do you know that the more time you are given, the more likely you are going to procrastinate and fill up the time with invented tasks? Perceived complexity of a task increases in relation to the time that is given to complete that task. Wait a minute! If we have so much time in a 9 to 5, why do many people have to work overtime? Depends on the job nature. If you work in accounting, client services, or anything that requires intensive labor and presence, overtime might be unavoidable. However, in the long run your happiness and freedom depends on your determination to delegate and eliminate. (See “ Build your remote mini-kingdom”) Given enough time, anybody who is willing to learn and change should be able to achieve an optimal work performance. Let’s go back to the discussion of why more time would decrease efficiency. Even workers that don’t require intensive labor and constant presence might get overtime on occasion. That’s because they are not used to pure, focused, and productive hours. Social conditioning compels people to work harder and longer. It only discourages people and makes them less efficient. It means more padding! Studies have shown that the average worker spends only 1.5 hours on actual work per day. Try the other way instead. Limit your working hours to 3 times of your actual work hours. Suppose on average you spend 1.5 hours on actual work, while the rest are interruptions, pointless meetings, idle chatter, shuffling papers, surfing the net… Try limiting your total work hours to 4.5 hours. Your brain will respond to the shorter timeline and force itself to adapt. It realizes that time becomes more precious and therefore automatically shifts its focus to things that are essentials. Gradually decrease that total working hours while increasing the actual work hours until you optimize your productivity ratio. If your actual work hours reach 4.5 hours, your total productivity is tripled! In order for this technique to work, you have to follow the rest of the tips. Read on. Share your question, story, or tips 7) Intercepting interruptions and putting up a wall around your cubicle The world loves to throw something in between you and your most important goals. Just like weeds that sprout in the garden, urgent minutiae and interruptions always appear out of nowhere when you are trying to finish something important. One of my heroes is Timothy Ferriss. In his book, “The 4-Hour Workweek”, he mentioned that there were three principal interruptions that could prevent the completion of a critical task: Time wasters: Things that can be eliminated with little or no consequence. Time wasters include meetings, chitchat, phone calls, and email that are unimportant. Time consumers: Monotonous tasks or requests that seem unavoidable such as answering emails, exchanging phone calls, customer service, financial or sales reporting, or personal errands. Empowerment failures: Being micromanaged or micromanaging others. To name a few examples: excessive paperwork that needs to go through the hierarchy, or the requirement to seek instructions and approvals for small decisions such as dealing with customer requests, cash expenditures of all types, and anything that you can come up with based on your own work experience. I hadn’t come up with any solutions to the aforementioned interruptions until I read “The 4-Hour Workweek”. Interruptions were annoying but seemed unpreventable to me then. Deep in my heart I felt that this was a major problem, but I had never heard of any workable solutions to it. When I discussed it with others, their general attitude was that of accepting the reality. Not for Tim. He goes very far when it comes to eliminating interruptions. His solutions are daring but workable. If you pick up his book and read it, you can tell from the writing that his ideas were based on actual experiences. Here are some general ideas from the The 4-Hour Workweek: (Most of the ideas sound unthinkable at first. Please read the book for full explanation and detailed steps if curious) Think about the successes you are going to miss because of the minutiae that are constantly taking away your time and energy. It takes drastic measures to eliminate interruptions, but it’s worth it. Boredom fills in where there is no excitement. It’s common to be busy all day and feel bored at the same time. If there is no challenge, discomforts, or deep engagement that come from utilizing the full potential of your intelligence and emotion, there is boredom. Interruptions and minutiae are the antithesis of excitement. Better to take risks and live a life of achievements than being bored or frustrated. Share your question, story, or tips 8) Let success be your sword! Use it as leverage and create options with it! Suppose that you have followed the tips above. You have taken the tractor and dumped the shovel. You have eliminated most of the interruptions. You have doubled or tripled your amount of productivity. All of a sudden you realize the sky is brighter and life is sweet. Don’t stop there. You either progress or digress at this point. Here is a critical turning point that could make the difference between your exodus from 9 to 5, or remaining stuck forever. Success is a great sword. Use it. Don’t just let it sit there. In fact, you should always use it as a major reason for not attending meetings, not checking and replying to emails too frequently, or even not showing up in the office. Every time when someone tries to take your time away from you, explain to him/her that you have so much on your plate already, and cite improvement in productivity when you skip such and such activities. (Again, it sounds unthinkable, but grasp a copy of “The 4-Hour Workweek” and you will get to know the rationales and methodologies behind the concept.) It doesn’t matter if your success is small. Any slight degree of improvement and success should be utilized. For average workers, all they could think of is using their record of success in exchange for job promotions. Sometimes a promotion is as bad as a demotion because of the increase in income tax, responsibility, and time commitment. It could mean more useless meetings, more overtime, decrease in real wages, and less time for yourself. Instead, think about how to keep your job, but eliminate everything except the most important, and then think of ways to negotiate for a work from home arrangement. This is where things start to become merry. As soon as you reach the point where you can work from home for your day job, consider yourself to be half way out of the rat race. With all the extra time and privacy, you can then start your own business, hire staff to do your work, travel around the world and anything that would have sounded crazy back then when you were restricted by time and location. Another great use of success is using it to create options. If the bully type co-workers, or boss, know that you need the job, and have no choice but to stay, then they’re more prone to take you for granted. You don’t need to announce to the world that you are looking for another job. However, it may serve you well if you send out signals that say you’re in hot demand, such as: Share your question, story, or tips 9) Build your own mini-kingdom: If you’re in a salary-based job position, and you’re producing more than what you are paid, then you should definitely consider converting your job position into a contract position. Why would anyone do that? We have job security and benefits from the employer! You may say. First, earned salary is the most taxed form of income. Governments encourage business growth by offering them tax benefits, because businesses create new jobs. If you work for your employer through your own company, you enjoy such tax benefits. You will be able to write off a portion of your expenses for such things as transportation, insurance, education, outsourcing, and even your home. Second, if you’re producing more than what you’re paid, isn’t it better for you to share some of that profit? If possible, propose a compensation plan to your employer that would allow you to get paid based on results. Third, as your employer becomes a client of your company, it means that you are now free to add other clients. Don’t worry about the workload. As a business owner, you should leverage on the time and skills of hired labor. You could hire freelancers, outsource companies, retired professional, students, or work-at-home parents to do all of your work. Getting paid by salary is like placing a cap on your income. It’s also limiting your time, which is your most important commodity. As a business owner, you are free to fire your clients with relatively small consequences, compared to firing your boss when you were an employee. You can then apply the 80/20 rule to your client base. Your most annoying clients are also the least profitable ones, so fire them, and then focus your resources on the most profitable ones. It could reduce your working hours by approximately 80%, while at the same time your income could be doubled or tripled. The principle behind this was the same as the one that was discussed in Double and Triple your productivity by doing less. Share your question, story, or tips Conclusion This is all. Each of the aforementioned techniques is just a glimpse of possibilities. It may take some time and more research to master the techniques, but doing so will make your life more satisfying and fun. A dedicated learner shouldn’t take more than 5 years to escape from a 9 to 5. 2-3 months isn’t impossible either. It takes some training, but the most difficult part is the paradigm shift. After all, the biggest enemy isn’t the boss, or the workplace, but yourself! Bookmark this article Share your tips or stories about stress in the work place, hostile work environment, job burnout, or bad boss!
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